One thing that I don’t remember thinking a lot about during the last couple years of my drinking was about inspirational thoughts. Well, maybe I would have a fleeting thought that might feel like it was entering one ear and then flying out the other. There might be something that I would watch on television and feel somewhat inspired but it would never stick. Sometimes there were late nights when certain music videos would come on and I would have a good cry. I wouldn’t say that I felt inspired. It would never really cause me to act on what I had just seen. Usually, I would just forget what I had seen all together.
I would think to myself “this is a great idea that I should share with others, to make someone’s day or change their world in someway”.
Nothing would ever come out of it and I would always just go get another drink, continuing to make far fetched bar plans that never came to be.
One reason that I really love my sobriety is that I can act on these feelings of inspiration and incorporate them into my daily life. Maybe before it was because I had a overwhelming feeling of failure, that nothing that I could set my mind to could be accomplished. I knew that there were actions that needed to be taken to improve my way of life… but that could wait until I had another drink. There was always a reason to postpone actions that were going to improve my way of life. I could always think of something that I would rather be doing than working on myself. This usually involved drugs or alcohol.
I was forced into recovery by my body and my near death. I had the desire to want to get sober but I had no idea how I was going to do it. I could not imagine my life with or without alcohol.
The Big Book calls this ” the jumping off point.”
Now that I have some time in recovery and I can look back on the events that brought me to the Beacon House and the road to recovery, I can say that I am appreciative for all of the events that took place to get me here. They have led me on a path to inspiration. I know that I can accomplish things that I once thought were impossible. I have learned through doing a through 4th Step that pretty much everything in my life has something to do with fear.
As I make my decisions on a daily basis I try to remember these things. I ask myself, ” Am I coming from a place of love or fear?”
I have the ability to be inspired by many things around me. I can take the way that I feel about these inspirational moments and tap into that power and have it be part of the fuel that moves me through my day. Above I have included a video that has been on YouTube for a little over a year. There are a lot of people that have seen this video.. over 9 million so far. If you have not seen it this is one of those inspirational examples that makes me think about how I approach situations on a daily basis. I hope that you enjoy it. I watch this video all the time.. sometimes I just need a little more fuel.
What does inspiration mean to you?